


That Ain't Gonna Help

by soueikaku



Category: Khonjin House (Web Series)
Genre: Alcohol, Drunk Shenanigans, Intrusive Thoughts, Mentions of Pent and Smack, Suicidal Thoughts, alcohol use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-23
Updated: 2017-03-23
Packaged: 2018-10-09 15:42:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10415448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soueikaku/pseuds/soueikaku
Summary: He can't stop remembering that damn event, can he?





	

For some odd, fucked up reason, Khonjin just couldn’t stop thinking about that day. I guess it could have been considered traumatic, but it still didn’t feel that way. It felt wrong, out of place. He wasn’t used to serious things in his normally silly life, it didn’t feel like his business. Sure, he may have handled it easily and rather nonchalantly, but that didn’t change the fact that now he had been really thinking about it, it didn’t feel right. Who was Pent? Who was Smack? He wondered if any of his coworkers knew about it, but he doubted it, and even if they did, it was unlikely they’d inform him. The only person he had the slightest clue about actually knowing anything about it had been Gino, but even then, he knew for a fact Gino wouldn’t tell him squat. He’d tell Khonjin just to fuck off and get out of his pizzeria per usual. And this is where he was stuck, he was constantly thinking about that god forsaken day with unusual vigor. He just wanted this shit to stop, he wasn’t even comfortable in his own thoughts anymore. 

 

He would either force himself to zone out, force himself to have a blank state of mind, or distract himself with mindless activities. He wanted it to stop, but the thoughts were near intrusive at this point. Could this be technically considered schizophrenia? Or even something worse? Maybe he should check out getting a therapist, but he doubted it in this city. It would probably cost a fortune, or he just gets a shitty doctor like he had plenty of times before. He honestly wasn’t rather concerned by the cost, since his father would probably shell out the money for him. He was tired, tired of constantly waking up and that would be the first thought in his damn head. He couldn’t stop thinking about it anymore, no matter what he tried. It felt consuming, and he felt damned to only thinking about that. It interfered with his work, his everyday life, and this is where he decided to do something rather drastic.

 

And here he was, drunk off his ass at the living room table, bottle of Moonshine tight in his right hand. He was enjoying his drunken stupor, giggling like he was five at every little thing. His eyes were wide as he had a wonderful idea.

 

What if he went on top of the roof? 

 

Giggling at his wonderful idea, he grabbed the bottle, and trudged his way outside. He climbed his way up the ladder on the side of his house and hiccuped. Ohhh, this was a lovely idea. This was a funnn idea. He was clearly too drunk to think properly, but who cares? It was way better than thinking about two guys his age fighting about this dead chick named Shelby. He didn’t care, who cares? No one. Nobody cares about anyone. He made his way onto the shingles, and gazed at the half hidden moon in the sky. The night had been rather cloudy, but he could see a few stars. It was hard though, mainly due to heavy light pollution in the city. But, it had been pleasant. Giggling like a madman, he slid to the edge of the roof, and stared at the ground in vigor. It’d probably be about a fifteen foot fall, which sounded absolutely delightful. Smiling wide, he pushed himself off the roof, and then realized what he had done.

 

It seemed as if his drunken haze had snapped, and he was now sober. Time seemed to slow as well, and Khonjin only then realized the screams coming from him. What the fuck was he doing?! He flailed his arms frantically, regretting his actions, mind in panic of what he’d done. He had no idea what the hell to do, but, then he realized. He had all the power in this world, and then he stopped mid-air, and lowered himself slowly to the ground. He sat on his doorstep in fear, veins pulsing with adrenaline. He noticed he had dropped his bottle of Moonshine on the way down, the blue bottle shattered a few yards away from him. Khonjin sighed, and pushed himself off the ground. Stumbling slightly, he sat down on the floor of his living room. His eyelids felt heavy, and he quickly fell asleep.

 

Definitely not the way to get rid of these awful thoughts.

 


End file.
